Weddings can be arranged on most days Monday – Saturday but before making any arrangements it is very important that you check to see if your preferred date is possible for us at St. Mary’s.  You should contact the Operations Manager, St Mary’s Church Office on 020 8741 5422 or email: [email protected]

You will be sent a link to enter your details.    We will then be able to confirm your eligibility and your booking

To publish your intention to marry, Banns must be called in the Parish Church of the parishes in which both the bride and groom reside. It is a legal requirement for the Banns to be published three times before the wedding. They are read out on three consecutive Sundays during the three months prior to your wedding. If you live outside the parish but are on the electoral roll of this parish because you attend services here, you still need to have your Banns read at your local Parish Church as well as at St. Mary’s.

If there is not enough notice given for the banns to be read before the marriage takes place of if one or both of you are British but do you live in England (or Wales), the Common License procedure needs to be used rather than banns.

If both or one of you is a national of a country outside the Europen Economic Area, you will require a Superintendent Registrar’s Certificate to marry , rather than have banns read.

A common license replaces the need for banns. If you have a legally recognised connection to where you are getting married, the application is usually straightforward, you can speak to the minister. The granting of the license is at the discreation of the church, part of the process requires you to swear an oath in person in England before a legal official- please bear this in mind if living abroad.  Common Licenses are only granted for a marriage to take place in a particular church and are valid for 3 months, the cost is usually around £200.

When you book the wedding we will arrange for one of the parish clergy to take the service. He/she will see you soon after the booking and on a number of occasions to help you put together your order of service and prepare for the wedding. He/she will take you through the different things you need to think about and ensure that St Mary’s provides the best possible start to your married life. Please take the initiative to contact the priest who is marrying you in the first instance. It is also possible for you to bring in a visiting priest to help with the service. This is strictly at the discretion of the Rector of St Mary’s and the parishes in which both the bride and groom reside.

At St Mary’s we take marriage preparation very seriously in the belief that your wedding is a deeply significant step in your lives. To help you prepare for your marriage, we would like to invite you to take part in a preparation course over two evenings. You will meet with a marriage team couple to discuss a number of matters of interest and concern to you both. It is informal, confidential and enjoyable! For more information contact Sanchi Murison on [email protected] at least 3 months before your wedding.

The wedding service normally has a Bible reading, which is chosen from a wide range of topics such as love, commitment and the best foundations for living. Some deal more specifically with the love of God and the example Jesus gave us. Your Priest will be able to help you decide on a reading that fits in with your wedding. As well as other Bible readings, she or he may be happy for you to include a suitable non-religious reading. Choices have been as diverse as ‘Winnie the Pooh’ and ‘Captain Corelli’.

At a wedding you need to plan for:

• Music while the guests arrive
• Music for The Procession of The Bride – her walk down the aisle at the start of the service
• Music during the service e.g. during the signing of the registers
• Hymns
• Music for The Recession – as you leave the church

Our Director of Music has prepared a great guide to choosing your wedding music to read it click here

Many wedding couples and those holding funeral services wish to include flowers. We at St Mary’s are delighted when they do as we feel they enhance the beauty of our very special church.

We are pleased to announce that you may now bring your own florist into St Mary’s Barnes for the creation of your displays.

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Photography is an important feature in your wedding arrangements and it is hoped you will arrange for a photographer who will respect the restrictions for photography in St. Mary’s Barnes. Please ask your photographer to speak to the priest before the service. Video photography is only permitted after consultation, please check with your priest. For legal reasons, the fees of the choir and organist are doubled when a video is taken.

Many couples like to have their own personal order of service sheet printed, although this not essential. If you are planning to do this please consult the priest conducting the wedding before it is printed. Printed example wedding orders of service are available from the Parish Office.

Our vergers would appreciate it if service sheets were available at least an hour before the service starts.

A wedding rehearsal with your priest will be arranged for some point during the week prior to your wedding. The bride, groom, the person giving away the bride, the best man or woman, bridesmaids and pageboys will need to attend your rehearsal. If you are using a personalised order of service, you will need to bring ten copies to the rehearsal. Members of the church will act as vergers for the service. The verger usually gets the church ready before the wedding, putting the heating on in good time, making sure everything is tidy, opening the church for flower arrangers if necessary and then welcomes guests as they arrive. They can help direct guests to the toilets if needed and may give out activities to children if the church provides them. They will be at the rehearsal and will be at the church from an hour before the service. They will be able to answer practical questions, reserve seats, turn on the lights and audio, arrange special chairs, and lock up the church afterwards.  Please ask them for any advice on the day.

The official wedding site of the Church of England has an excellent Wedding Planning aid. There is also a section with suggestions for readings. This list has suggestions of wedding apps that can help you create your own wedding website and also find suppliers, keep track of your budget, guest list, and seating plan.